This morning my heart is heavy.
The hospital doctor has told me they are unable to help my mother as she is not responding to treatment. Therefore, once the current infection in her body has taken hold (the source of which they say they are unable to identify), it will take her life. It could be days. It could be weeks. I am numb with disbelief.
I have a choice—choose to be a victim and succumb to anger and resentment (and believe me I have struggled with these)—or choose to be a victor.
But how does one emerge a victor in such a scenario?
One refuses to listen to the lies of the Enemy who whispers: how can God love you when he has not answered your prayer for miraculous healing? How can God love your mother when he is allowing her to die from such a cruel disease and without dignity?
One let’s go of the desire to dictate to God what he should do… how he should “prove” himself to you by manifesting his might and miraculous power within your mother’s life—surely her healing would bring glory to him?
One let’s go of the desire to determine how He (who does all things after the counsel of his own will) should perform, and genuinely say: “not my will O Lord but your will be done”. One accepts that you may not understand… the situation may not seem glorious or victorious, but God IS nevertheless in control.
One continues to pray and to believe God’s Word—even though circumstances may scream the exact opposite of what you have prayed and believed… even though circumstances question the very integrity of God’s Holy Scriptures. After all, neither Satan, nor man has the last word.
Hope is being able to see that there is light despite all of the darkness. Desmond Tutu
One humbles self. I am not omnipotent. I am not omniscient. I am not omnipresent. I am a servant of the most High God—He does not serve me!
One dies to self. Dies to the temptation to be immature… to try to bargain, to sulk, to throw your spiritual resources (faith, hope, trust in God) out of the window.
One refrains from asking: “why my mum?” After all she has done. After all her faithfulness to God, to the Body of Christ, to the Great Commission, to her church members.
One rejoices in the fact that God has honoured me to be the daughter of such a beautiful, godly mother. One celebrates her life, her example and, as Proverbs 31:28 decrees will happen, one rises up and calls her blessed.
One prays for her… that she will be comforted by the Holy Spirit… that the Lord will minister to her with that peace which surpasses natural understanding… that God will continue to strengthen her with might in her inner man and that He will be the health and brightness of her countenance.
One commits her into our Father God’s hands knowing that He loves her with an EVERLASTING love, knowing that his mercies are NEW every morning, knowing that he is able to cause ALL things to work together for her good, since she has been called according to his purpose.
One trusts in the Lord with all their heart and refuses to lean on their limited understanding.
Far better is it to dare mighty things, to win glorious triumphs, even though checkered by failure… than to rank with those poor spirits who neither enjoy nor suffer much, because they live in a gray twilight that knows not victory nor defeat.
One forgives. And one lets go those who have not celebrated or appreciated her the way you believe they should. But if not quite able to do this, one shares their heart, their feelings openly with the Lord (who sees and knows all things) and one asks him to work within your heart and bring you to the place where you desire to do God’s perfect will and also obey it.
One submits to the washing from the water of God’s Word, to the Word’s sanctifying fire, so that the dross of self-serving demands and ungodly attitudes are purified from one’s life.
One prays with new understanding and listens to the wise counsel of the Holy Spirit and sees from a new perspective.
One says along with Job: “shall we indeed accept good from God, and shall we not accept adversity?” (Job 2:10).
…hope that is seen is not hope; for why does one still hope for what he sees? But if we hope for what we do not see, we eagerly wait for it with perseverance.
(Romans 8:24-25 NKJ)
QUESTION: How do you deal with disappointed hopes?