Every morning you’ll hear me at it again.
Every morning I lay out the pieces of my life on your altar
and watch for fire to descend.
(Psalm 5:3 The Message)
Even though my mother (God rest her soul) inducted me into a lifestyle of prayer, it was not always easy to maintain a prayerful lifestyle. I admit it was probably not as hard for me as it is for some others within the body of Christ, who did not have that particular example and influence around them, but I nevertheless sometimes struggled.
Usually, it was because of difficult circumstances which the Enemy used to demean and distract me.
Just as King David did, I discovered that there are times when you have to speak to your soul and encourage yourself in the Lord.
The following is an extract from my writing journal, where I sought to both speak to and motivate myself, so I could continue to pray for myself and for others, regardless of how I felt; so I could deal with those issues which often tripped me up and prevented me from praying, or else undermined the effectiveness of my prayers.
I share this journal extract in the hopes that it will speak to the hearts of those who truly love God and want to please him, yet struggle in their walk with the Lord because of disappointments, or discouraging circumstances which the Enemy uses, to try and break their focus (often successfully).
I share in the hopes that those who struggle to maintain a consistent prayer life, will be encouraged to push through with determination.
The power to change things. Change me, change others, change my community, change my world.
It is the positive power of the tongue. When you pray, you are able to join forces with God, imitate him, when he spoke in the beginning and said: “Let there be…”. There was darkness, there was void, there was no life. However, he spoke and it changed the earth’s atmosphere and environment.
Carol, are you not happy with your life, your relationships, your social and economic environment? Then change it! Take the Word of God and apply it by speaking to your circumstances with authority and in faith.
To speak with authority there must be belief in what you are saying. There must be confidence that you have the right to ask, or declare that thing. There must be confidence that what you say will come to pass.
What undermines that confidence, that assurance?
It is sin. It is the sneaking suspicion at the back of your mind that you are not quite there spiritually, that you have blotted your copy book so to speak with your rebellion and stubbornness.
You know what the Word of God says about forgiveness but nevertheless, you feel that your case is an exception, or you feel that to obey God’s word in that regard is too costly.
Yes, it is costly. Costly to your flesh. To your pride, to your self-esteem. You feel to forgive is to render you a doormat. Render you weak and impotent and pathetic whilst your offender is empowered over you.
You think to hold on to your unforgiving attitude is to hold onto the last vestiges of self-respect. That person doesn’t respect you. Onlookers who see and know what has been done also do not respect you.
Who respects the weak? Who respects the put-upon, the one who is put down not just once or twice or even three times but again and again and again and again until it becomes a cycle, until it becomes a way of life, until your thoughts and your heart and your entire life is wrapped around tightly with the scorn, ridicule and contempt, of others like a silk worm in its cocoon. Wrapped so tightly, until that person’s hatred, or jealousy, or malice, or reproach, seeps into your soul, poisoning your entire spiritual immune system.
You have the Word of God in your heart. You have the blood of Jesus that declares you righteous and justified but somehow you have allowed the poison of other people’s opinion and antics to break down your spiritual immune system. You have treated the Word of God, the name of Jesus, the blood of the Lamb, the anointing that breaks the yoke, as insignificant, in comparison to your woes, your wounds.
What is significant (to you), is that this person or those people should not get away with making you feel a non-entity, a no person, a bottom of the heap hobo. And yet… in the Kingdom of God, when it comes to our relationship with others— particularly those that mistreat or persecute us—that is sometimes how God wants us to view ourselves.
If you hold onto your life (your reputation, your self-esteem, your pride blah blah) then you will lose it! But, Jesus says if you will lose (i.e. deliberately let go of) these things for my sake, then you will find it (a higher, God-blessed life).
What a paradox!
In comparison to this world and how it thinks and operates, the Kingdom of God is a topsy-turvy way of operating. The world says: celebrate yourself, pamper yourself, live for yourself! But the Word of God says: crucify your flesh, die to self, deny yourself.
Carol, where are you in God’s equation?
Choose you this day whom you will serve—will it be your Father God, or yourself (i.e. the demands of your unruly flesh)?
[end of journal extract]
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Dear friends and followers, I am choosing to be a victor. I am choosing to be a victorious overcomer.
How about you?
With much love,
Carol (aka Lady Cee)
Author of: Petitions From My Heart
Related Reading: Underdog or Overcomer
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